Time to play another of Queen Mimi’s memes. Thanksgiving was yesterday, but my stomach still feels full so I guess it’s not too late to play!

1. If you knew this would be the last Thanksgiving holiday with your family, what would you do differently.  I would thank them for their love and affection, then I would eat like there’s no next year!

2. What is your favorite Thanksgiving dinner dish? Princess Gail is quite a dish at all the holidays! She’s my favorite!

3. Why did John Smith fall in love with Pocahontas? Was it her beauty or her bravery? Like all great romances, I think it was her hair and her butt.

4. Fill in the blank: Over the river and through the woods to Queen Mimi‘s blog we go.

5. What is a cornucopia?
A. A foot ailment  B. Freud’s hidden coping strategy  C. a Enuch with a very large vocabulary D. third cousin of Onomatopoeia. Well it’s not the Eunuch. They only say “ouch,” in a high pitched voice.

6. Find a word that rhymes with Thanksgiving. Spanksgiving.

7.  Do you have any holiday traditions you’d like to share with us? Being traditionalists, Princess Gail and I celebrate the traditional John Smith & Pocahontas Spanksgiving ritual.

Happy Belated Thanksgiving!!

Welcome to the Queen’s Tuesday Meme #38

Sometimes silly.
Sometimes serious.
Always fun!
Step out of the box.
Be creative.
Use your imagination.

We all love to wine and dine with our families and those we care about. Some of us talk about it. Some of us don’t. Regardless, we all have stories to tell…. past and present. Take a trip down memory lane or unfold your fantasy night out on the blog for all to read. We’re all ears. Waiter! Waiter!

1. When is the last time you went out to dinner with someone special? Tell us about it.

Well… we skipped dinner today (but not dessert!) because we had a late lunch. So it was yesterday, with Princess Gail! It was a romantic pizza, with lovely green peppers, onion and ham, nicely presented on a round pizza pan!

2. Show us a picture of your favorite cuisine.

3. What is the funniest thing a man/woman has said to you lately?

You know what, I can’t remember any one specific thing. Gail and I laugh at dumb stuff all day long. I get chuckles at work, and through several of the blogs I visit. My gift/curse is that I have a pretty even keel. I don’t experience life in the extremes, including “funniest.”

4. What makes a gentleman a gentleman in today’s dating world? Are there any left?

Off the top of her head, Princess Gail said it’s good manners and respect that make a gentleman. She also said she got the last one. (We gave each other rose colored glasses as wedding presents.)

5. Is there anything you won’t tolerate when out to dinner with your significant other?

I can’t even imagine it. We have never treated each other with anything but love and kindness.

6. What type of ambiance do you enjoy in an eating establishment?

I like a blend of elegant and eclectic. I like a casual dress code, but not sloppy. I like creativity in the way the place is decorated, and the way the food is prepared and presented. I like the energy and excitement of a popular place, but not overly crowded or noisy to the point that conversation is difficult.

7. Tell us about the worst public dining experience you ever had, whether it be a date or with your family.

I can’t think of one that would be “the worst.” I can almost always find something that I enjoyed about a night out. I guess my glass of Diet Coke is always half full!

8. What is the lamest or rudest thing a man/woman has said to you lately?

I ordered Diet Coke, and the jerk waiter said “Pepsi?” Then I said “with lime,” and he said, “lemon?”

9. Are you a good tipper?

Never less than 20%

10. Do you ask for doggie bags when you leave food on your plate at a restaurant?

Gail and I often split a meal and still have enough to put in a doggie bag! Too much food! And anyway, we have to leave room for dessert!

11. What is your pet peeve about restaurants and dining out in general?

Probably that the temperature is never exactly right. That’s not that big a deal, though.

12. Do you prefer to order yourself or do you ever let your significant other order for you?

Like I said before, Princess Gail and I often split a meal, and I almost always let her decide what we’ll eat, because I like just about everything. But it’s not like we order for the other person. I’ve always thought that was controlling and weird.

13. Describe your most intimate romantic dinner ever. (fantasy or real)

Yesterday’s pizza was really very special!

14. Do you enjoy piano bars?

Yes! A lot! Because of the ambiance and the type of music, not because of the alcohol.

15. If you could go anywhere in the world for dinner, where would it be and who would you be with?

The Green Valley Grill, with Princess Gail, Queen Mimi and her King.

The UnValentine Grumpy Meme

1. What did you get for Valentine’s Day? Hall’s Mentho-Lyptus. (You can imagine how romantic I look and feel right now.)

2. What will you miss most about Valentine’s Day? I’ll miss the chocolate, but only for a little while. I have stashes all over the place. Valentine’s day comes and goes. Chocolate is forever!

3. What could you have done differently yesterday tomake the day sweeter? I could have taken Princess Gail out to someplace more romantic than Smiley’s BBQ.

4. How many roses make a dozen? Easy. Twelve! Is this a trick question? I’m way too literal and concrete for a question like this. I must be missing something. Twelve, right? Yeah, twelve. I’m sticking to it.

5. You and your love are getting matching tattoos for Valentine’s Day. What will they be? Hmmm… Master/Slave?  Princess/Frog?  Peace/Love? Tarheels/BlueDevils? We should probably both have the same tat. Might have to go with a picture of a red tin foiled chocolate rose! I love those!

6. Does your significant other have an annoying cute little habit you’d like to break? Nope. It’s all part of her charm!

7. What did you get someone for Valentine’s Day? I think I might have given Gail an Upper Respiratory Infection, with all my love.

8. Write one word on this candy heart you’ve been dying to say to a romantic connection from your past. Thanks!

9. Be a poet. Write a 4-line poem starting with Roses are red…. There’s wine in the cup… Now get in the bed… And shut the hell up…  (That was the UN-love version. I would NEVER talk to Princess Gail like that. I just thought it was funny.) The LOVE version goes: Roses are red… Buntings are blue… In love and in like…  I’m just crazy ’bout you!

10. What song best describes your Valentine’s Day experience this year? All Choked Up.

11. I, Mimi Grumpy Skirt, am so glad this meme is almost over. This is my final question. I made it eleven questions in honor of the 11 roses I didn’t receive. Aren’t they lovely? This is my final final question, Regis:
Two cupids are in a knock down drag out fight on the floor of the Senate. One is a constituent from Venus, the other from Mars.
What is the name of the legislation are they fighting over? Top Down Legislation! I like the sound of that!

This is the perfect meme for the moment! Thanks to Queen Mimi for these peaceful questions!

1. How do you find your own personal peace/nirvana?

I try to figure out what is making me anxious. Sometimes it takes a prayer for clarity. And many times I just have to keep repeating the Serenity Prayer over and over like a mantra. Other ways that work for me are physical exercise, relaxation exercises, and our massage chair.
2. Where do you go to find respite and solace?
Is there a particular place, city, country, room in your house?

Our house is roomy enough to find a quiet spot, and we are all respectful enough to give each other alone time when needed.

3. Who is the most peace-loving person you know? What makes them so?

Martha Wheeler.  She is a long time friend from Toledo. I have always been impressed by her kind and peaceful manner. She accomplishes an amazing lot, and always in an elegant, peaceful, unhurried, and unruffled way.

4. What do you do when your inner peace is threatened?
Do you have a strategy, a routine, religious faith, a mantra……to calm yourself down?

See #1.

5. What is your favorite comfort food?

Cookies or pie.  I prefer pie, because I count it as a “fruit group” selection!  ;-)
6. Do you have a pet that brings you happiness and peace? If not, what type of animals bring you peaceful thoughts?

Birds, because they are outside pets! (I wouldn’t mind an imaginary dog, either!)

7. What is your favorite peace song?

Peace it Together. It’s a song I’ve been working on for a while. Maybe for the next BB4P?

8. Did you post a peace globe on November 5th and participate in BlogBlast For Peace?

Duh… like, who didn’t!?!

A Writing Exercise. The Long Sentence
You’re going to write for a total of ten minutes straight. No breaks. You’ll write one long sentence, not stopping for punctuation. Do not go back to correct grammar or re-organize sentences. Let the words come forth, just get them down even if the sequence doesn’t make sense. This release will help you relax and get you into the groove of writing.
I’m giving you the first five words:
“The last time I saw ……..”

Ready? Set the timer, now breathe and go!
This was one of the first exercises I ever did, and it led to the writing of this poem.

Remember, you are loved and you are blessed! Breathe and write!
-Kanani

And here is my stuff:

“The last time I saw…” the mountains will not be my last. I became even more convinced that this is not only something I desire but something I need. We did not have the greatest weather, and it didn’t make any difference. The peace was still there, and the silence and the big sky. The clouds passed by in slow motion, some above us and some below. I could see the steam of the clouds slowly taking on new shapes. I can stand there watching clouds for minutes on end, as if there aren’t more important things in the world. There is something timeless about the mountains, something healing, something awesome in the truest sense of the word. This last experience was near Asheville, North Carolina, with the Blue Ridge in full view and in fall splendor. The air was chilly but not cold. Overnight rain had left the valley full of dense cloud below us, with only certain peaks that were high enough popping through. The heat of the morning sun quickly dried that up. leaving a green valley with distant houses and specks of cars that were barely visible. I could hear the rustle of the leaves and the caw of an occasional blackbird. I listened for the wild turkeys I have heard in the area, but was disappointed not to hear any on this trip. They’re probably in hiding with Thanksgiving right around the corner! Ha! Car trips up and down the mountains are very much fun for longtime flatlanders. The roads are windy and single lane in the steepest parts of the mountain close to the cabin where we stayed. Rutted gravel makes the car shimmy and shake and adds to the driving suspense. There was a part near the very top that was so steep the car couldn’t make it except in reverse! But we got up safely and thanked the Lord for surviving and for the adventure. Going down is much easier of course, and allows full enjoyment of the view, especially as some of the trees have lost much of their foliage. Down in the valley, little towns like Old Fort and Black Mountain can take up most of our day if we let them, and we do. It is healing and enriching to lose sense of time for a while, and go where the heart desires, aimlessly and joyfully. We like to have a mission on those days, but never mind if we are distracted over and over again and never quite accomplish what we set out to do, knowing full well it was merely and excuse to get going and a starting point. Back at the mountain cabin, like on most vacations, I try to never miss a sunrise or sunset. Why is that so mystical and serene? Why do I feel connected to all people who have ever roamed the earth when I am watching a sunrise or sunset? I don’t know, but what happens to me is an easy reflection at sunrise about what the day might have in store, and at sunset what the day that just passed was like. Promise and hope in the morning, and a sense of accomplishment and gratitude in the evening. What could be better than that?

There are now 285 bottles floating in the bloggy ocean just waiting to be mysteriously delivered to a tropical island near you. It’s time you added yours!

Here are the rules:

You are about to send a virtual Message In a Bottle across the Blog Ocean.Leave a message in the sand or on the bottle. Write anything you wish. Be a pirate or a poet. Serious or silly. Rant or ruminate.  Anonymous or not. What message would you like to send out to the universe?

1. Compose a message to place in your virtual bottle below. It can even be ANONYMOUS message. I will not reveal your identity.

2. Right click and Save the graphic below.

3. Use a graphics program of your choice to place the message on the picture.

4. Post the meme and these rules on your blog.

5. Tag a minimum of five people – or your entire blogroll – to do the same. Notify them of the tag.

If anyone finds this, my message is:

And, since I only have about 5 readers… consider yourselves tagged!  Sorry.  If I didn’t add that line I would end up in the Queen’s dungeon.  There are bad people in there.  And a pretty boy like myself would not be safe, if you know what I mean!

; )

I’m playing one of Mimi’s memes today. Great subject!  She’s not only the Queen of Memes, she’s the Great Dame of Lame Dates! LOL  Check out her dating profiles blog for a few laughs. Guys, be warned, don your flak jackets, helmets, and any other protective gear you might find!

From the Queen Herself:

Welcome back to the Queens Tuesday Meme.

Are you up for the challenge? Take a look at these seven dating profile headlines from real dating sites. Imagine you are trying to find a date and these gems have just landed in your inbox. How would you respond to them? Write a comeback response to each one. Be sarcastic, be funny, be brave! Spelling errors not my own. Names and locations have been changed to protect the terminally single. If you need inspiration, go HERE for hundreds of funny examples.
You know you wanna play!

In honor of my 500th “Bachelor of The Day” to post this week on my site called Dating Profile Of The Day we bring you The Dating Meme. For three years I’ve been rummaging through online dating profiles to find the zaniest and most ridiculous profile headlines out there. They write ‘em. I spoof ‘em. Do you know that some folks are grammatically insane?? And some are just insane.
Ergo, today’s meme was born.

———————————-
Okay, Mimi. So here are my answers, written as a real woman should reply, from a man’s perspective, being the man’s man that I am am!

1. Birdbrain looking for a mate

I’m short and tweet! Looking for a Birdbrain to lay on my egg!

2. Where Are All The Bad Girls?

Here we are! Me, myself and I! Call us!

3. A Good Woman Is Hard To Fine

A hard man is good to find!

4. Does God Know You’ve Escaped From Heaven?

Actually, I was let go. So, let’s go!

5. I Put the Fun in DysFUNctional

Jackpot! I’ve dated soo many functional men, and they are NO FUN! Call me!

6. Does this profile make me look fat?

ooh, no! I love a man who looks like he could out-eat me and out-drink me!

7. I’m a no nonsince person with little tolorrance for stupitity

I love it when guys pretend they can’t spell. You are soo funny!

Thanks, Mimi! That was fun! I was able to tap into the girly side of me!

; )

If I were you, I’d do the meme.

The Blog Outside The Box Meme
This meme is all about using your imagination. Free your inner blogginess. Step outside the proverbial blox (that’s blog + box for all you non-blog speakers). Answer these ridiculous situational questions and post them on your own blog. Here’s the situation for today. We won’t tell a soul. And remember: Don’t end up in the dungeon.

1. You are in court. You are in deep doo-doo. What did you do? (‘Cause if you want, I might could talk to the judge and get your sentence reduced to Bloggingham dungeon time.)

I didn’t do it, I tell ya! She asked me to hold them for her, so I did! I didn’t know she was talking about something else! And anyway, I couldn’t see very well. The sun was in my eyes. Yeah, that’s it, the sun was in my eyes. So I held them for her, like she asked me to, and then she screamed, and dropped her rice kits all over the floor. That’s how it happened, Your Honor.

2. Your blog just became a best-selling book . What is the title of your book ?

The Best Parties: fostering the incidence of decadence. (I figured out that sex, drugs and rock-and-roll sell a lot better than my blog does.)

3. It is midnight. The phone rings. It is Michael Jackson calling from the Great Beyond.
What would you like to ask him?

Michael, WTF does “shamon” mean?!?

4. You are having your future told. The fortune teller looks in the crystal ball, screams and leaves the room in fright. What did they see?

No hair where there should be, and hair where there shouldn’t be. Scary. Just ask Princess Gail!

5. You’re blogging along minding your own blusiness (that’s blog + oh…you know) when Google unexpectedly puts a Objectionable Content Warning on your blog. Your own mother is afraid to enter! What, pray tell, did you do to warrant it? How did this happen? Do you think you deserve it? Just how objectionable are you? Do tell.

Like I told my mother, I don’t know WTF Google is talkin’ about!

6. You suddenly become God Of The Universe. What would your first Commandment be?

First Commandment: Don’t make me God of the Universe again! It didn’t work out very well the last times we tried that, remember!?

7. And finally, what secret would you like to tell the Queen?

Shhh. I know what “shamon” means. Want me to show you?

; )